I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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