I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
