I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
