He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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