the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
