the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
