Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
