so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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