Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
