There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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