I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
