she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
