Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
