the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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