Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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