I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Randomize
