She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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