For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
