hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
