WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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