I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
