i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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