that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Operation Purity has been aborted
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
