ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
