At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
