i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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