it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Randomize
