Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
