My brain says no but my pants say off.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
