Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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