Nicole vs. Life
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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