when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
