Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
