where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize