Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
