it was like having sex with a tree stump
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
