Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
