The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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