Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize