fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You ate ashes out of my bong
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize