So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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