When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
