Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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