Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
someone owes me an orgasm
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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