Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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