HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize
