This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
