Soap is not a condiment
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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