Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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