Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I understand Curling. That high.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
